You’ve done the hard part and asked for help. Then you were told there’s a wait. Here is what that wait usually looks like in Hampshire, what you’re allowed to do in the meantime, and how private therapy can bridge the gap without putting your NHS place at risk.
The short answer: yes, in most cases you can see a private therapist while you’re on the NHS waiting list. Being referred to NHS Talking Therapies does not stop you getting help elsewhere, and nobody will penalise you for it. The one thing to do is tell the NHS service, because some teams prefer you not to be in two talking therapies at the same time, and a few will ask for a short gap between finishing private sessions and starting theirs.
How the NHS wait actually works in Hampshire
For most people in Fareham, Gosport, Portsmouth and Southampton, the route is NHS Talking Therapies Hampshire (many local GP surgeries still call it italk). You don’t need a GP referral; you can refer yourself online or by phone.
The published national figure is that around 85% of people have their first appointment within six weeks. That number is real, but the first appointment is usually an assessment, not treatment. After that, the service decides which “step” you need:
Step 2 is guided self-help, online courses or short group work, and usually starts fairly quickly.
Step 3 is one-to-one CBT, counselling for depression, or trauma work such as EMDR. This is where the longer waits sit, and for trauma-focused therapy it can be months.
So if a friend tells you they were “seen in a fortnight” and someone else says they waited the best part of a year, both can be true. It depends on what you were assessed as needing.
Will going private affect my place on the NHS list?
This is the question that stops people, and the honest answer is: it depends on the service, so ask them directly. Policies vary between areas and even between teams. Four questions to put to them:
Do I stay on the list? In most cases yes. Private therapy is not a reason to discharge you. Ask them to confirm it by email so you have it.
Do you want a gap? Some services ask you to finish private sessions before NHS treatment starts, so the two approaches don’t pull in different directions. Find out how long.
Can I pause rather than leave? If private therapy helps and you’d rather keep the NHS option open, ask whether you can defer your place rather than decline it.
What if I’m offered Step 2 first? In many areas you can accept guided self-help alongside private sessions, because it isn’t classed as a second talking therapy. Check.
If the person you speak to isn’t sure, that’s normal. Ask them to check with the clinical lead and come back to you. It’s a reasonable request and a common one.
Using private therapy as a bridge, not a replacement
You don’t have to choose between the two. Many of the people who come to us while they’re waiting don’t want long-term private therapy. They want to stop the wheels coming off between now and then. In practice that tends to look like one of three things.
A few sessions to steady things. Four to six sessions of counselling or CBT is often enough to understand what’s driving the anxiety or low mood, put some tools in place, and feel less at the mercy of it. Some people find that’s all they needed and later decline the NHS place. Others go into NHS treatment calmer and clearer about what they want from it.
Starting the work you were told to wait for. If you were assessed as needing trauma-focused therapy, that is usually the longest wait. EMDR and hypnotherapy with an experienced therapist can begin within days rather than months. You can still take the NHS place later if you want it.
A fortnightly check-in. If budget is tight, fortnightly sessions keep the cost down and still give you a regular, confidential place to think things through. It’s a legitimate way to use therapy, not a lesser version.
What’s different about private therapy (and what isn’t)
It’s worth being fair to both. NHS Talking Therapies is free, evidence-based and staffed by trained practitioners. The differences are mostly about choice and time.
Choice of approach. The NHS offer is largely CBT-led. Privately you can choose counselling, CBT, hypnotherapy, EMDR or a blend, and change course if something isn’t working.
Choice of therapist. You pick who you work with, and you see the same therapist each week.
No fixed cap. NHS courses are often six to twelve sessions. Privately you stop when you’re ready, which can be sooner or later.
Speed. Most people who contact us are seen within a few days, with evening and online appointments.
What isn’t different: the problems people bring, and the fact that therapy is still work. A good private therapist will be as honest with you about progress as an NHS one.
If private therapy isn’t affordable right now
We’d rather you got help somewhere than nowhere, so here are the routes worth knowing about:
Low-cost counselling through local charities such as Solent Mind, which offers paid counselling with short waits.
Your employer’s Employee Assistance Programme, if there is one. Many include a handful of free counselling sessions and most people never use them.
Student counselling services, if you’re at college or university.
Trainee counsellors on placement, who are supervised and often charge a reduced fee.
Asking a private therapist about a shorter course or spacing sessions out. It’s a normal conversation to have.
Whatever you decide, keep your GP in the loop, and if things get worse while you wait, don’t sit on it. NHS 111 (option 2) is there for urgent mental health support in Hampshire, and Samaritans are on 116 123 at any hour.
How we can help while you wait
At OLIP Therapy in Fareham we see people at exactly this point every week. Counselling starts from £72 a session, CBT and hypnotherapy from £90, and EMDR from £126, in person at Lancaster Court or online across the UK, with evening appointments available.
The easiest first step is a free, confidential 15-minute call. You tell us what’s going on and where you are with the NHS, and we’ll tell you honestly whether a few sessions would help, which approach fits, and who on the team is the right therapist for you. No pressure to book anything afterwards.
Book your free 15-minute call or ring us free on 0800 970 4776.
Frequently asked questions
Can I have private therapy and NHS therapy at the same time?
Sometimes. Many services are happy for you to have private sessions while you wait, but prefer you not to be in two courses of active treatment at once. Ask your local service what their policy is.
Will I be taken off the NHS waiting list if I go private?
Usually not, but it varies. Ask the service directly and get the answer by email so you have it in writing.
How long is the wait for NHS Talking Therapies in Hampshire?
The first appointment (an assessment) is usually within a few weeks. The wait for one-to-one treatment after that depends on what you need, and for trauma-focused therapy it can be months.
How many private sessions would I need to bridge the gap?
Many people find four to six sessions enough to feel steadier and better equipped. Some continue, some stop, and some go on to NHS treatment afterwards. You decide.
Is private therapy better than the NHS?
Not better, different. The NHS is free and evidence-based. Private therapy gives you choice of therapist and approach, continuity, no fixed session cap, and a much shorter wait.
